I just can't get anything done!!
How am I expected to clean the house, shop, cook, do the washing, ferry the kids around - all with an obstreperous Hattie in tow - and also write regularly, blog regularly and chase part-time teaching work for September?????
And all that's without factoring in the haemophilia. This morning I optimistically - and some would say stupidly - dressed for a run. My lovely child-minder friend was having Hattie for the morning (.... some crazy idea that it'll get her used to me going back to work), and I thought that I might just be able to sneak away before returning to the long imaginary to-do list in my head which began highlighted in bold, 'Hoover Ed's Bedroom' (oh.... the glamour of my life). I won't continue down the list but you get the picture.
Anyhow.... Ed has had a painful bleed deep inside his knee since Monday tea-time when he went out to play football. I treated him on Monday night (new blue needles) and again yesterday morning. But this morning he was still hobbling - packing him off to school, while tempting, didn't seem to be the entirely responsible option. So, after changing out of the fetching running gear, off we went to hospital. Last week he was there on Tuesday and Wednesday morning, this week he missed this whole morning and may have to go tomorrow if things aren't settled.
I am meant to be starting to write an article as well as ringing and arranging to visit several schools today. I also promised Rog I'd look over his latest job applicaton letter (for a headship - not bad!), and I wanted to run (did I mention that), and I needed to clean, as usual. Now I have about half an hour before the school run and all I want to do is lie comatose... or at least slump with a cup of tea in hand.
I also wanted to post on my blog today. Have actually done that! I've achieved something then!
Showing posts with label house. Show all posts
Showing posts with label house. Show all posts
Wednesday, 18 May 2011
Wednesday, 11 May 2011
Wednesday Blues
I've been for a run! Well - more like a power walk with sporadic and very short bursts of running. But still - I got myself into gear and headed for the park. And I've booked a Zumba class for Friday too.
I'm pretty sure that there won't be any discernable change on the outside for some time to come.....but I feel fitter already.
It's been such a hassly week. Ed has been backwards and forwards to hospital after hurting himself at a roller-skating party at the weekend. And yesterday - again - I couldn't find a vein. The upshot of me not being able to treat him myself before school, was that we had to spend the best part of the morning at the hospital; Hattie missed her music session which she loves and spent most of the morning wailing in disappointment; and I??? I could feel my blood pressure rising! Today we've just returned home from the second visit of the week - it ran so late that I just got Ed back to school in time for the afternoon session. And even then he was eating his lunch in the car on the way. I'll be lucky if Hattie gets any sleep at all before I have to whisk her out of bed and go to fetch the kids.
On top of this, I have one seriously overworked, seriously stressed husband who's not sleeping due worrying..... and we have no bloody money. I need to find a job, and fast! Although I'm not sure how all the ferrying, cooking, cleaning and washing will get done if I'm working as well.
So - I'm pleased that I did actually head out to the park this morning before the hospital appointment. I was almost distracted by the state of the house (how I wish I had a cleaner), but in the nick of time I decided that some fresh air would do more for my spirits than a clean house. And it did - although the stairs selfishly didn't hoover themselves while I was out.
I'm pretty sure that there won't be any discernable change on the outside for some time to come.....but I feel fitter already.
It's been such a hassly week. Ed has been backwards and forwards to hospital after hurting himself at a roller-skating party at the weekend. And yesterday - again - I couldn't find a vein. The upshot of me not being able to treat him myself before school, was that we had to spend the best part of the morning at the hospital; Hattie missed her music session which she loves and spent most of the morning wailing in disappointment; and I??? I could feel my blood pressure rising! Today we've just returned home from the second visit of the week - it ran so late that I just got Ed back to school in time for the afternoon session. And even then he was eating his lunch in the car on the way. I'll be lucky if Hattie gets any sleep at all before I have to whisk her out of bed and go to fetch the kids.
On top of this, I have one seriously overworked, seriously stressed husband who's not sleeping due worrying..... and we have no bloody money. I need to find a job, and fast! Although I'm not sure how all the ferrying, cooking, cleaning and washing will get done if I'm working as well.
So - I'm pleased that I did actually head out to the park this morning before the hospital appointment. I was almost distracted by the state of the house (how I wish I had a cleaner), but in the nick of time I decided that some fresh air would do more for my spirits than a clean house. And it did - although the stairs selfishly didn't hoover themselves while I was out.
Tuesday, 25 May 2010
This May I'm........
gardening!
For the past two years our garden has been a source of embarrassment -even if I have had a pretty good reason for the neglect, what with my survival kind of taking centre stage, and my exhaustion meaning that the sofa was more appealing if I had any child-free time.
But this May, I'm feeling well. Not tired - hence my gym visits, and feeling much more confident that I might just get to next May with a bit of luck. Gardening seems a positive investment in my time and energy. Martha and I are spending time together digging, weeding and watering and things are looking better on the green front. Admittedly Hattie is not entirely an asset when tidying up the garden - pushing her toys into my brand new lupin indeed! And the kittens are keen on helping with the digging in their own particular way. However it is a very good thing to be alive and well and in the garden at all.
We're planning a rasberry and pear crumble made with fruit grown from our own garden. We won't be able to make the crumble until next August - but that's ok, we can wait.
For the past two years our garden has been a source of embarrassment -even if I have had a pretty good reason for the neglect, what with my survival kind of taking centre stage, and my exhaustion meaning that the sofa was more appealing if I had any child-free time.
But this May, I'm feeling well. Not tired - hence my gym visits, and feeling much more confident that I might just get to next May with a bit of luck. Gardening seems a positive investment in my time and energy. Martha and I are spending time together digging, weeding and watering and things are looking better on the green front. Admittedly Hattie is not entirely an asset when tidying up the garden - pushing her toys into my brand new lupin indeed! And the kittens are keen on helping with the digging in their own particular way. However it is a very good thing to be alive and well and in the garden at all.
We're planning a rasberry and pear crumble made with fruit grown from our own garden. We won't be able to make the crumble until next August - but that's ok, we can wait.
Friday, 8 January 2010
New Space
I spent this morning sorting out our spare room, in the attempt to turn it into an office.
Since we moved into our house four years ago, Rog has worked every night on the kitchen table, leaving books and files behind him in the morning as he sets off to work. And for four years it has driven me demented. It's not his fault - until we finished our loft conversion, we needed every inch of space to squeeze in the children we kept producing.
The spare room, which used to be Martha's room until November contained a shameful secret. Behind the soft toys, and general child accoutrements hid storage boxes containing piles of papers, letters and statements. For a time they had a colourful rug thrown jauntily over them in a futile attempt to disguise them. But they remained there glowing under their cover. We just did not have any room - every corner of our house has been bulging with stuff that needs to be sorted, discarded, recycled or stored properly.
When Martha moved out of her room to share with her brother, we were finishing decorating the other rooms. So this little room became the repository of all sorts of 'stuff' which temporarily or permanently needed to find another home.
Pah! Anyone with me here?
And while the rest of the house, due to mammoth sinus-y effort over Christmas was finally finished, this one room remained full to the brim of all that hadn't been rehoused.
But - no longer is it like this! This week while being snowed in - forced to suspend my normal life for something much slower, I've been working on that little room. This morning I spent two hours while the baby slept sorting through boxes, creating piles for recycling, shredding or keeping.
These boxes were mostly full of things from my single life, before I'd met Roger and before I'd had my kids. I spent the morning transported back to another life. I found photographs which I'd forgotten, in which I'm smiling unconcerned little knowing what the future held. And of course it held both good and bad. But I look at my skinny pre-child, pre-cancer self and the nostalgia at times is almost too much to bear. The past 10 years for me (my thirties) have been truly eventful - by far the most eventful decade of my life. And I kind of feel exhausted for myself.
This January 2010 I'm hoping firstly that I'm around for the next ten years - something which didn't cross the mind of my 30 year old self - and secondly that the next ten years are rather more peaceful.
And now that little room is tidy and sorted - waiting for its desk and Rog to move in with all his work clutter. And I can reclaim the kitchen table at last.
Since we moved into our house four years ago, Rog has worked every night on the kitchen table, leaving books and files behind him in the morning as he sets off to work. And for four years it has driven me demented. It's not his fault - until we finished our loft conversion, we needed every inch of space to squeeze in the children we kept producing.
The spare room, which used to be Martha's room until November contained a shameful secret. Behind the soft toys, and general child accoutrements hid storage boxes containing piles of papers, letters and statements. For a time they had a colourful rug thrown jauntily over them in a futile attempt to disguise them. But they remained there glowing under their cover. We just did not have any room - every corner of our house has been bulging with stuff that needs to be sorted, discarded, recycled or stored properly.
When Martha moved out of her room to share with her brother, we were finishing decorating the other rooms. So this little room became the repository of all sorts of 'stuff' which temporarily or permanently needed to find another home.
Pah! Anyone with me here?
And while the rest of the house, due to mammoth sinus-y effort over Christmas was finally finished, this one room remained full to the brim of all that hadn't been rehoused.
But - no longer is it like this! This week while being snowed in - forced to suspend my normal life for something much slower, I've been working on that little room. This morning I spent two hours while the baby slept sorting through boxes, creating piles for recycling, shredding or keeping.
These boxes were mostly full of things from my single life, before I'd met Roger and before I'd had my kids. I spent the morning transported back to another life. I found photographs which I'd forgotten, in which I'm smiling unconcerned little knowing what the future held. And of course it held both good and bad. But I look at my skinny pre-child, pre-cancer self and the nostalgia at times is almost too much to bear. The past 10 years for me (my thirties) have been truly eventful - by far the most eventful decade of my life. And I kind of feel exhausted for myself.
This January 2010 I'm hoping firstly that I'm around for the next ten years - something which didn't cross the mind of my 30 year old self - and secondly that the next ten years are rather more peaceful.
And now that little room is tidy and sorted - waiting for its desk and Rog to move in with all his work clutter. And I can reclaim the kitchen table at last.
Tuesday, 29 December 2009
A Monster in the Room
We went to the sales yesterday. Were we crazy? The city was packed with people jostling for bargains. We bought a television!! For the past seven years we have happily watched a bulky, old fashioned box - in no way could it be described as chic, slim and flat-screened. But we haven't noticed or cared that there has been a revolution in the kind of televisions most people watch. A revolution - that's the right word I think.
But now - after one discussion - we have a huge, flat-screened monster which looms scarily in the corner of our room. I ask again. Were we crazy?
And we bought saucepans. I'm very pleased with them - very, very pleased with them. Do I sound 40? I fear I do.
And don't ask about the sinusitis.
But now - after one discussion - we have a huge, flat-screened monster which looms scarily in the corner of our room. I ask again. Were we crazy?
And we bought saucepans. I'm very pleased with them - very, very pleased with them. Do I sound 40? I fear I do.
And don't ask about the sinusitis.
Monday, 21 December 2009
End of Advent - the Woodburner Arrives
What a lovely squat, black and very hot woodburner is cooking in our kitchen now. The perfumed smell of the wood fills our house. I can't be long writing this because I have to go and re-re-readjust the draught regulator (technical term? I think not) to get the optimum flame on my wood. I think I may spend many hours burning wood and watching the flames. It's all too exciting - a new loft bedroom and a new woodburner. And it's Christmas.
Monday, 7 December 2009
Our House
I'm tired today - you want to know why? Because I am so excited about our new loft bedroom that I can't sleep properly in it! Childish? Yes, very. But if you knew the blood,sweat and tears that have occurred over the completion of our loft conversion, you'd be excited too. It's all so glamorous up there at the moment - like a little oasis away from the noise of the rest of the house. And because we live in the city, we were short on views. But not anymore. Now, up in my lovely bedroom I can see over the rooftops to the purple Cheviot Hills beyond, the spidery wind turbines on the hills in County Durham as well as across the mosaic of the city itself.
Our house is coming up to its 100th birthday - and in a way I feel as if we have given it a present. It's a lovely, if tatty, Edwardian house and we've been here for nearly 5 years. Before that a family lived here for a short while and before that the original owners lived and died inside this house. But in all that time the loft has been waiting - the beams straining under the roof, the chimneys standing un-noticed sentinels - for some attention and loving care. And now the chimney seems to sway against the sky as I lie in bed and watch its silhouette, close enough to touch if I lean out of the window.
For the first time in this house we've enough room to move around each other without collisions and without stuff piled into every corner. We sort of plan to move into the country in the next couple of years; out of all my family, I'm the only city dweller. But it occurs to me that maybe we're beginning to turn this house into a home and maybe we're going to find it hard to leave.
Our house is coming up to its 100th birthday - and in a way I feel as if we have given it a present. It's a lovely, if tatty, Edwardian house and we've been here for nearly 5 years. Before that a family lived here for a short while and before that the original owners lived and died inside this house. But in all that time the loft has been waiting - the beams straining under the roof, the chimneys standing un-noticed sentinels - for some attention and loving care. And now the chimney seems to sway against the sky as I lie in bed and watch its silhouette, close enough to touch if I lean out of the window.
For the first time in this house we've enough room to move around each other without collisions and without stuff piled into every corner. We sort of plan to move into the country in the next couple of years; out of all my family, I'm the only city dweller. But it occurs to me that maybe we're beginning to turn this house into a home and maybe we're going to find it hard to leave.
Sunday, 15 November 2009
Another of Those Weekends!
Phew - why do weekends seem more exhausting than the weekdays? Ed's party was crazy - I'm not sure why I thought that Roger and I could manage 10 over-excited kids. Suffice to say the two-and-a-half hours passed very, very slowly although very, very noisily indeed. A big glass of wine was consumed once the kids were in bed. And Ed had a lovely time so I guess that's all that really matters. Thank heavens he only has one birthday a year.
And today Martha and I took Ed to his riding lesson and then we went to the supermarket to do a mammoth week's worth of shopping. Came home, unpacked the shopping, made the kids lunch, chased the toddling baby around while the others cycled outside, cooked a big Sunday meal for the evening, bathed the kids, washed and dried hair and now still have a pile of school uniforms and shirts to iron and packed lunches to make before I can crawl exhausted into bed. And I don't think Ed has stopped talking the whole weekend. I know, I know - it's nothing amazing or unusual - we all do it, but it's so bloody tiring. I'm not wishing time away, I'm not - really!!! - but I can see how much easier things might be when the kids are a bit older and a bit more self sufficient. Honestly - I feel as if I've run a marathon today, and maybe it'd feel a bit easier if there was just a small bit of space available in the day for me to enjoy on my own behalf. Perhaps I'm just too old - I wish I'd had my kids in my twenties. Having three such small ones (6, 4 and 18 months) and being 40 is rather exhausting. And I guess there's all the health stuff I'm battling with. Anyhow, I'm feeling much better - swine flu is behind me now and I'm feeling quite smug about it. No more swine flu for me!! Unless it mutates of course!!!!
My plan tomorrow is to write, write, write while the kids are at school and the baby sleeps. Am I the only person who sometimes drops her kids off at school with a small sigh of relief?
And today Martha and I took Ed to his riding lesson and then we went to the supermarket to do a mammoth week's worth of shopping. Came home, unpacked the shopping, made the kids lunch, chased the toddling baby around while the others cycled outside, cooked a big Sunday meal for the evening, bathed the kids, washed and dried hair and now still have a pile of school uniforms and shirts to iron and packed lunches to make before I can crawl exhausted into bed. And I don't think Ed has stopped talking the whole weekend. I know, I know - it's nothing amazing or unusual - we all do it, but it's so bloody tiring. I'm not wishing time away, I'm not - really!!! - but I can see how much easier things might be when the kids are a bit older and a bit more self sufficient. Honestly - I feel as if I've run a marathon today, and maybe it'd feel a bit easier if there was just a small bit of space available in the day for me to enjoy on my own behalf. Perhaps I'm just too old - I wish I'd had my kids in my twenties. Having three such small ones (6, 4 and 18 months) and being 40 is rather exhausting. And I guess there's all the health stuff I'm battling with. Anyhow, I'm feeling much better - swine flu is behind me now and I'm feeling quite smug about it. No more swine flu for me!! Unless it mutates of course!!!!
My plan tomorrow is to write, write, write while the kids are at school and the baby sleeps. Am I the only person who sometimes drops her kids off at school with a small sigh of relief?
Tuesday, 29 September 2009
Woman Around the House
Well, I came over all house-wifely today - a bit of a surprise for all concerned. I decided that I HAD to sort the piles of stuff which had accumulated around our house and which had become mountains of Everestian (!!) proportions as we wait for our loft conversion to be finished. So with the baby flapping around in the middle of the floor, swimming in paper I attacked it all with gusto. Gusto at the beginning which quickly became something less energetic and more bewildered. Recycling and shredding - blocked the shredder, filled the kitchen with bags of paper, magazines, envelopes and junk mail. And now I hope the recycling lorry is coming tomorrow or I need to spend the day carting it all somewhere noble and green!
Also - note to myself. STOP eating biscuits in the evening if I want to revisit svelte pre-cancer, pre-pregnancy body. Gym visits are all very well but I'm going to have to forgo a few pleasures I think for a little while. Diets don't really sit well with my philosophy of life however neither does allowing myself to look like a middle-aged mum when I'm only just 40. There's nothing like a bit of vanity to distract oneself from troubles and woes.
Also - note to myself. STOP eating biscuits in the evening if I want to revisit svelte pre-cancer, pre-pregnancy body. Gym visits are all very well but I'm going to have to forgo a few pleasures I think for a little while. Diets don't really sit well with my philosophy of life however neither does allowing myself to look like a middle-aged mum when I'm only just 40. There's nothing like a bit of vanity to distract oneself from troubles and woes.
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