Kate's Blog

Follow me if you will as I try to navigate through the ups and downs of my world.

I'm writing this blog to help me make sense of all that has happened - from my diagnosis with non-Hodgkins lymphoma while pregnant with my third child in May 2008
, through to my reflections on chaotic family life as I try to pick up the pieces of my life again.

The kids are so small, and I'm working hard to keep us all safe and to stay in remission.

Stay with me - it won't be all doom and gloom I promise!

Wednesday, 18 January 2012

Trying Times

Sometimes my children make me feel so angry. I'm not alone.... am I?

I won't describe the particular incident which triggered my meltdown (not too strong a term for it, I assure you!)last night, apart from mentioning the constant struggle involved in getting a certain son to do as he's told. Not all the time - that would just be unreasonable - but just some of the time. Just some of the time, after a long day at work, I would appreciate a bit of consideration and a bit of peace and quiet. The problem is that when I'm tired, Ed has more energy and determination to resist me than I have energy and determination to deal with him like a perfect parent.

Sometimes our whole household seems full of strife and noise - despite us all loving each other and despite my resolutions to deal with the kids with more calm, more patience and more consistency.

Maybe I'm just too old to be a parent. I wish I'd had them in my twenties. Would that have made a difference?


Vince said...

Oh, I don't know. You could be something out of a fairy tale but I doubt it.
And you having a meltdown or two will only do what you're supposed to do in your prep' of the boy for whatever hormonal lunatic you'll call daughter-in-law. :-)
Imaging his shock with the other 50% if you're the perfect picture of sanity.

Wally B said...

I'd have killed Alex if I was in my twenties. It is a struggle with strong willed kids. I have to step away when I get to the blood boil stage as I am frightened sometimes that I might hurt him. Things don't help when I don't get support from my other half, who would like everything to be conflict free.
Hang on in there.

Rebecca S. said...

In your twenties you may have had more energy, yes, but probably less patience. I know that can be hard to believe! Your kids are definitely at that tough age when everything is an emotional reaction and it's all so intense sometimes. Hang in there...spring is around the corner, isn't it?

Isidora said...

Hello, I also get sometimes very angry and shouty with the kids, and hate it. Interested to hear about others, that's why I signed up to your blog. I wonder what triggered your meltdown? I don't know whether I am more patient now (41) than I would have been in my twenties, but I do appreciate my 'relative wisdom' of this age. It's just the most bloody hard job in the world, I have twin girls who are 7 and a 18 months old boy. Maybe we should stop being so hard on ourselves?