Kate's Blog

Follow me if you will as I try to navigate through the ups and downs of my world.

I'm writing this blog to help me make sense of all that has happened - from my diagnosis with non-Hodgkins lymphoma while pregnant with my third child in May 2008
, through to my reflections on chaotic family life as I try to pick up the pieces of my life again.

The kids are so small, and I'm working hard to keep us all safe and to stay in remission.

Stay with me - it won't be all doom and gloom I promise!

Tuesday, 29 June 2010


I know that I'm really neglecting my blog at the moment.

Life seems to be getting in the way.

I'm doing lots more writing which pleases me immensely even if it'll quite possibly never see the light of day. I'm also working on a project - looking through an aquaintance's book to give my considered opinion(!) It's become quite a lot of work although I just really agreed to read it as a favour and now I'm in the awkward position of needing to be honest. But, what the hell do I know?

I have a really sore lower back too. It's my old problem giving me hassle but still in the recesses of my mind I'm worrying that it's really a tumour forming around my spine. Nice image - and one which stays with me a little too clearly in the middle of the night. I'm having some physiotherapy for it tomorrow so hopefully that'll ease it, and put my mind to rest too.

But I'm managing to go to the gym, or go swimming at least twice a week and I'm starting Pilates tomorrow evening. A more flexible me is just around the corner!

I'm waiting for a positive result from one of my 30 letters that I sent out to local high schools, asking for a couple of days work in September. On the other hand, I'm enjoying my time with Hattie and my days have a nice peaceful rhythm to them with a good afternoon patch to write in before the kids come back from school and while Hattie has her sleep. Long may Hattie's afternoon sleep continue in such a satisfactory way.

Maybe I can find work in the New Year instead! No-one can accuse me of not trying. Is it my fault that there're no vacancies at the moment.....?

I'm kind of getting the feeling that Hattie needs me at home at the moment. I get a wierd impression that she kind of senses all that we missed out on together when she was born and she needs to make it up now. On the other hand, that could be a convenient thought to justify staying away from teaching just that little bit longer.

Inconsequential I know, but do you have a bread-making machine? I have just got mine and I LOVE it. Some weeks I'm almost making a loaf a day.

And, have you read 'Kafka on the Shore' by Haruki Murakami? It's compulsive, deep and thought-provoking but also amazingly readable. I'm planning on finishing it tonight. I think it's one of the most interesting books I've ever read.


Vince said...

Is your bread maker euphemism for the cause of the back pain.

Tracey said...

First, Vince is a thirteen year old boy.

Second, I think the position you are in with your friend's book is interesting. I was just thinking the other day about being in the position. Which is odd, as I don't know any one who is writing a book. Except bloggy friends. Tough spot. Imagine, if you had your work all completed with a bow on it, and you asked someone to read it. Would you want the truth?

Third, about your back. No, wait, before I say anything about your health, I must say that I am this very morning hopped up on pain meds for a miscarriage related medical condition of my own and that may be making me too bold, but this is what I have to say about your back...What do you have to gain by worrying? Either you will relapse (God forbid) or you won't. No ounce of worry will change anything, except the quality of your life. Then again, I will borrow trouble if I don't have my own to worry about, so what the hell do I know?

I love you in a bloggy friend way, I shall pray for your health, and your writing, and we all look forward to September when life always seems to slow a bit.

Tim Riley said...

Keep enjoying your time at home-there's never enough of that.

Rebecca S. said...

Congrats on your new nephew! There have been two births of boys in our community in the last couple of weeks, and it is so exciting (but always reminds me of exhaustion for some reason). Lower back pain usually means weak tummy muscles and poor posture (and not lifting children and other heavy objects with the legs). Your exercise routine will definitely help, but please don't overdo it.

I read the manuscript of my friend Toni's book and then she asked me to be honest. Good thing it was so good! Phew! Mind you, I don't think it is a bad thing to be honest, as long as it's done diplomatically - isn't that why he/she asked for your opinion?

I wish I knew why you wished you were in Glastonbury! x (my son just told me its a big music festival. Duh!)

Vince said...

I had so-called back pain for years. Every time I went about it the medics sent me to a Physio. But I've since discovered that I have a profound allergy to milk and all its products, and Lactose from any source will act on muscle in any part of my body sending them into spasm but mostly in those either side of the lower spine.
Commercial yeast breads use a huge amount of milk product.
Since I've made my own bread. Rather since I've kept a very close eye on my food sources, I forget sometimes, the pain has diminished hugely.