Ed is ill today. Dreaded swine flu?? I don't know... he certainly shows some of the symptoms. I think there's quite a few off with it at his school. I'm worried about him and to be honest I'm worried about me too. I'm meant to be getting the vaccine when it arrives, but I have a feeling I'll already have the blasted thing by then. I've quite considerable damage to my lungs from the radiotherapy and my immune system's none too great. I'm not really worried but I would rather not have another concern. We're off on Saturday for a couple of weeks to Scotland which I'm really looking forward to - it definitely helps my state of mind to be physically far away from the doctors and the hospital at least from time to time - and I don't want our plans scuppered at the last moment by anyone being ill in the family.
We had quite a hassly weekend in the end. The kids were scratchy - probably sickening for whatever Ed has and crazily my husband and I tried to do some of the jobs in the house which needed doing. Just small stuff, nothing major. However we came to the conclusion, as we have many times before but we just never learn, that one can get absolutely nothing done with small children around. Changing a lightbulb would be an achievement! If it wasn't the two older ones fighting it was the baby - seriously toddling now - marching around the house pulling things out of cupboards, emptying pots of pencils.... you get the picture. Ed did have his riding lesson, Martha did go to her friend's party, I did cook a very excellent chicken cacciatore, but we didn't manage to fix the kids' bikes for the holiday or choose paint colours for our loft. And some shouting was done.
My appointment with the consultant is on Wednesday - I feel very stressed about it but think I will dive in there and ask her for more details about what might happen should my next scan show something it shouldn't. I'm doing some deep breathing - but sometimes I wish that a packet of cigarettes and a bottle of Jack Daniels were considered healthy coping strategies. Ho hum...
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